Empty

I have successfully burned the candle and both ends, and held a flame in the middle.
and now..
I'm empty

Usually I would feel a vast array of emotions flooding in my brain from moment to moment, and to be honest I feel like my mind is on pause while the rest of the world keeps moving. How did this happen? At the end of my first year of college I feel tired and weak, I feel like I'm hiding from God and hiding from what's real.

Maybe I'm just caught up in the future again.

The thought of moving home for the summer in two weeks. The thought of marrying Seth. The thought of moving into a new apartment in the fall. The thought of trying to rebuild broken friendships. The thought of a career. Thought's of what is going to happen with my parents. Thoughts of my grandma. Lingering thoughts of my Grandpa whom I can't stop thinking about lately. Thoughts of being a leader for the Inn next year.

Maybe I'm all thought out.

Either way I can't seem to focus. I feel down and unmotivated. I feel like giving up.
But I can't, I can't afford to.

Is it possible to step outside my brain for a few hours?

Probably not. But it's a nice thought

Lord, take me out of this mess. Set me upon the rock which is You.